Everything old is (mostly) new again!

Back in the spring Troy and I attended a charity fundraiser for the father of one of my neighbors. They held a silent auction and we bought/won 8 hours of work done by a professional handyman. Sweet! In the 8 years that I've lived there, I've torn out carpet, painted walls, laid linoleum tiles (thanks Mom!), made curtains, etc, etc, etc. However, my house is 60 years old and I don't touch anything electrical or plumbing-related. That's when I call in the professionals!

This last weekend the professional came to my rescue. I had 4 hours at my disposal and I intended to use every minute. Kenny (the handyman) had come out to assess the jobs ahead of time and we decided on 3 projects to keep him busy. First, we would replace the less than attractive light fixture hanging over my kitchen table. It had been there since I moved in, I never liked it and now I think the electrical components were starting to go. That's not good! (The white one is the old one and the brown one is new.)

He would then install some security lights on my house and garage to illuminate the backyard. I don't live in a bad neighborhood or anything, but I grew concerned this winter when I saw some (big) man-sized footprints in the snow in my backyard. It's completely fenced in and there's no reason for anyone to be back there unless I know they are there.

His final task would be in the back room of my house. It's basically used as a poker room and holiday gathering space when I have lots of people over now. It was added on when the previous owners of the house came into some money in the late 70s. Its previous life was as a back porch. It's a good sized room, but the remodel was done on the cheap. They didn't insulate (doh!), installed a REALLY crappy gas heater and simply built over the cement entry step. The heater was taken care of about 5 years ago (the gas man who took it out said it was so bad that he wouldn't have installed it when it was brand new!) and my dad dry-walled over the hole left by the old heater, so now it was time to deal with that extra step that LOTS of people have nearly hurt themselves on.

When we ripped up the carpet and laid linoleum tiles back there, we tried to fix the problem by building a wooden box (step) to cover the cement step. Unfortunately, the box has been cracking since then which has also messed up the linoleum on top. Kenny's job was going to be to tackle that old step.

Boy, did I underestimate the work required to complete that task! He spent several hours with a HUGE mallet and chisel trying to dig it out. Finally he gave up and he's supposed to be bringing a jack hammer over tonight to finish the job. I can hardly wait to have a jack hammer used INSIDE of my house! Not!

I'll keep you posted on how everything turns out and I'm make sure to show the before and after pictures.

<

August Sushi date

A big thank you to C for joining me for my August sushi outting. We went to one of her favorite sushi spots in the city - partly because it's centrally located between where we each live, but mostly because it has EXCELLENT sushi.

On the menu? C had an appetizer of some cheesy stuff. I didn't even realize that Japanese people ate "bad for you" food! I had an appetizer of edamame. Yum! We then shared several rolls including Canadian roll, Bob's roll, Philadelphia roll and soft shell crab. C also had a roll that had some eel in it, but eel's not my favorite, so I passed on that one.

We had a lovely conversation about our experiences at Gen Con, talked about her quickly growing daughter and her adventures and simply enjoyed the lovely sushi. It was a very nice evening.

If you're interested in joining me for September's sushi smorgasboard, drop me a line.

7000 and holding....

In the hunt for 100,000 pennies, I'm currently at 7,000 and holding. While $70 in pennies is nothing to sneeze at (or carry if you have a bad back!), it's a long way from the goal of $1000 in pennies.

So, while you're all gathering your pennies for me, (you are, right?) how about we think about what charity you all think might be deserving? I've placed a poll on the right side of the page where you can cast your vote. I've placed three charities there that are near and dear to my heart. If you like one of those, feel free to vote for it. If you have other suggestions, just leave me a comment and I'll add it to the poll.

The top 2 vote getters will share the donation and you have until midnight of September 30th to vote. Vote early! Vote often!

They call it poker because.....

Somebody has to get poked!

We (Troy and I) love to play poker and this weekend I certainly got my fill for a while.

The weekend of poker actually started on Thursday night with the monthly low stakes game at my house. I didn't do well, but unfortunately, that never stops me from trying again and again.

With that spirit in my heart, we made our way down to the Indiana Live casino in Shelbyville, IN on Friday night. Troy has done QUITE well there the last few times he's gone. Unfortunately, I can't say the same thing. I think there's something that happens to the men mentally when a woman sits down to the table. Until she "proves" she knows how to play, they refuse to fold and often feel like pushing her around with their chip stacks. It's like their egos can't handle actually folding to a woman. That's great when my cards are better than theirs, but unfortunately sometimes they hang around and end up beating me because they got lucky with their cards even though they shouldn't have stayed in in the first place. I kept that in mind and really tightened up my play. My play was so tight and my cards were so crappy that I played just 1 hand in the first 1 1/2 hours that I was there. Ugh. Not very interesting, but it's a great test of discipline. After a while I started getting cards and doing ok. I was never up very much, but I was definitely holding my own. That was until I made a VERY bad call. I had Ace/Queen and there was an Ace and 3 low cards on the board. The guy next to me goes all in and I call because I have a great kicker (the Queen). Unfortunately he had two pair and ended up taking all of my money. Ouch!

A little dazed, I stood up from the table and then walked around the casino for about 30 or 40 minutes (Troy was still playing and doing well). I hemmed and hawwed and eventually decided to lick my wounds and go back in with some more money. This time I was seated at a different table than Troy. Sitting down it was like I had just decided to take a dunk in the shark tank wearing a meat suit. First, all of the people at the table were men and many of them had 2, 3 or 4 times the amount of money that I was going to sit down with. Second, there was a look in their eyes that kind of scared me. Later I would realize that perhaps it was all of the alcohol that they had been consuming.

Once again I played only premium hands. I took down a couple of good sized pots and the guys began to realize that I was a pretty good player. Perhaps their folding also had something to do with the fact that I told them that 1) I don't straddle, 2) I don't play crappy cards and 3) I don't bluff. Seriously. I'm no good at lying.

After a few hours (and LOTS of badgering from one particularly drunk guy), I had made back about 3/4 of what I had lost at the first table. It was 3:40 AM and I was more than ready to go home. I headed to the cashier to cash out while Troy finished up a few last hands. Oh! And were those an AMAZING last few hands. If you want the details, just ask, but I'll sum it up quickly by saying he nearly tripled his money in just 1 hand and walked out with a very heavy wallet!!

Our final night of poker was Saturday evening at a charity event* to raise money for breast cancer research that we played in last year. This is where the poker gods showed that they have a fickle nature. First, the gods were kind to me: There were 18 participants in the tournament and things were going along pretty well for me. I had been much more blessed with good cards than the night before and my chip stack was growing steadily. Justin, the player across from me, had apparently gotten my card luck from the night before and had barely played a hand.

The blinds at this point were 20/40 and one of the short stacks went all in for 100. I called (I had about 4500 in chips) with King Jack in my hand. Justin raised the bet to 600. I paused for a moment and then called his raise. We were down to just the 3 of us in the pot. The flop came Jack/4/7. Justin again bet 600. I now had a pair of Jacks, so I called. The turn was a 3. At this point Justin went all in for another 1950. I had him covered, but if I lost I would have a LOT less left in chips. At this point, I realized he has to have pocket Aces. The smart thing to do at this point is to fold. I know he has to have me beat. Instead, I'm on the fence. I just have no idea what I want to do. It could go either way. I could fold or call. It was 50/50. At this point, I hear Troy, who's at the other table, say "I'm all in." Well, that does it for me. I'm gonna call. I figure the worst that can happen is that we will both be out at the same time. Was it a wise choice to make? No. We flip over our cards and yes, indeed, he shows his two Aces. At this point, the only cards that can help me are a King or a Jack. A king would give me two pair. A jack would give me three of a kind. Either way, those were the only two hands that could beat his pair of Aces. I stood up and prepared to leave. All the while I was begging the board to show me a King. The last card? A KING! The table erupted! Needless to say, Justin was (rightfully) pissed! I had called when I shouldn't have and now he was out of the tournament. I was actually embarrassed at my luck and I didn't want any of the attention I was getting.

Oh, how the winds of fate can turn. About an hour later, we were down to 5 players at our table and the blinds had increased to 200/400. I was the small blind and looked down at Ace/Queen of spades. When you're down to 5 players, that's a really strong hand pre-flop. The first player to act raises the bet to 1000 and I go All In for an additional 3500 or so. The Big Blind folds and now it's back to the player who originally bet 1000. Now it's his turn to hem and haw. He has more chips than me, so if he calls and loses, he's not out. Finally he decides to call. We flip over our cards and he shows a pair of sixes. At this point, we're about even. If nothing comes for me, his sixes will hold, but if an Ace or Queen comes, I win. The flop? Wait for it.......

King 6 6. Yeah! That's right. He flopped quad sixes. OUCH! No need to see the rest of the cards since there was no way I could win. It was painful, but at least I went down in a blaze of glory.

So I will lick my wounds, play a little online poker for free and save up my money for next month's games.

* If you would like to know how to help support Karen Shaffer in her fund raising efforts, please visit her site at http://www.endcancer.org/site/TR/Events/2009Indianapolis?px=1073901&pg=personal&fr_id=1030. Donations are easy, tax deductible and VERY appreciated!

Kharma

Sometimes I get EXACTLY what I deserve. That is most certainly NOT a good thing sometimes. I think they call that kharma.

Yesterday, because the bowling season started, my poor puppy was stuck in her kennel for most of the day. I hate doing that to her because she isn't quite a year old yet and needs LOTS of exercise. So, in order to compensate, I promised her that I would take her for a REALLY long walk when I got home last night. Ok, admittedly SHE doesn't remember anything for more than 2 minutes, so I actually promised myself.

So, true to my word, when I got home, I hooked her to her leash and we set out. It was night and I couldn't really see the sky, but it didn't seem like it was going to rain or anything. HA! I was SOOOOO wrong. We had been out for about 30 minutes or so and we were a good 4 blocks from the house when the skies let loose. Since it was just me and juggling a dog on a leash and a scooper is about all I can handle, I certainly didn't take an umbrella with me. The result was that in less than a block, I was soaked to the skin. When you're THAT wet, I don't think there's really any point in hurrying, so we eventually made it back home.

It rained so hard that by the time we got home, even Sasha couldn't wait to get inside. And she LOVES to be out in the rain. That's wet!

Riddle me this, Batman....

Why is it that we often feel compelled to jump onto bandwagons that we actually want nothing to do with?

The more I get to know about myself (LOTS of therapy, you know), the more I realize that most of my life I've been HEAVILY influenced by the opinions of society and especially my friends and family around me. There can be good and bad things about that, but for someone who is a "people pleaser" such as I am, it makes discerning what it is that you really want for and in your life very difficult.

For instance, growing up I always felt like if I wasn't married and had at least 2 kids by the time I was 30, then my life was bound to be a failure. Well, here I am in my mid-30s with no husband or kids around and that's ok. In fact, most of the time I feel like it's a really great thing. I get to do things, go places, have experiences on a whim that I wouldn't be able to have if I had the familial responsibilities of a husband and kids. I have a house of my own and don't have to pick up after anyone else. (Which is a good thing too because I have a hard enough time cleaning up after myself, two cats and a dog.) I enjoy my "alone" time and I like that if I want to go to bed at 8 or stay up all night long, there's no one to stop me. The problem with feeling this way and living in the midwest is....no one believes you. I get the feeling they think I must be lying. I couldn't possibly enjoy spending alone and I MUST want to hear the pitter-patter of little feet.

Don't get me wrong. If I felt like it was the right time/place/thing to do for myself, I would certainly take the plunge into matrimonial bliss. If my husband and I then thought that the experience of having children and truly being there for them would enrich our lives (and theirs), I'm open to that as well. But if I should decide that's not the life I want to lead, I don't want to explain that to everyone that I encounter. There should be no looks of pity for those of us that are voluntarily single. We aren't defective despite the fact that this world is set up for couples and families. (If you don't think this is the case, simply try to have a meal alone in a restaurant or go the movies unaccompanied. I guarantee you will get looks.)

Ok, so let's say we've conquered the midwestern pressure to couple up. There's another sort of peer pressure that I think is out there and much more insidious. The struggle to "keep up with the Joneses". I succumbed to it about 8 years ago when I bought my house. I felt like life was passing me by. My (younger) brother was married and he and his wife had just bought a house. What did it say about me if I didn't have a house as well? So, after looking at a LOT of houses, I bought the one I currently live in. Despite the fact that perhaps it was a bit more house than I needed as a single girl (1800 sq ft, 4 bdrms), I fell in love with it the minute I walked in. It just felt like "my" house.

At the time, the mortgage payments seemed like a lot, but I wisely did NOT borrow as much as they were willing to give me and thankfully 8 years (and many raises) later, the payments are quite comfortable. I've been able to furnish it. The utility bills don't cause my heart to race every month when they show up. I'm still able to eat and occasionally splurge on myself in nearly whatever way I see fit. Sure there are lots of things I want to do to continually take care of her and spruce her up, but show me a 60-year-old house where that isn't true.

So, why is it this morning when I overheard someone talking about the offer they made on a house (quite a bit more than I spent), I suddenly felt somehow inadequate? Would a new (bigger, more expensive) house make me happier? Would I feel more loved and more important to those I care about? Would a big house really reflect my values and opinions? No. Do I still somehow feel the societal pressure to keep up? Yes. Why is that?

Is this true for other people or are other people more secure in who they are and what they believe? For them, do these things not even register on their radars? Are they somehow able to not even notice the constant "buy, buy, buy" message that is sent out because they know that if they bought that new car or bigger house, that would be the wrong decision for THEM? If this is the case, how did they get that way?

What about you? What kinds of societal pressures do you have to confront? How are you doing with those confrontations?

What motivates you?

I'm a joiner. I admit it. At the church that I attend, I am a liturgist, a member of the finance committee and currently chairing a committee for the September fish fry. (Excellent fish fry, by the way. Let me know if you're interested and I'll get you the details!) Oh...did I mention I'm not actually a MEMBER of this church?

Doing a charity walk/run/ride? Need a new player at your poker game? Looking for new members for your book club? Well, I'm your gal. Just ask. I'm sure I'll say yes. Do I actually have time to add MORE activities to my schedule? Probably not. Will that stop me from joining? Once again, probably not. But that's a rant for another day.

Why do I bring this up? Tonight starts my bowling league. I've been bowling on this league for about 8 years (WOW! Time sure does fly!) and I thoroughly enjoy it....most of the time. Our team is most definitely in it to have fun. That's certainly not the case for lots of the other teams on the league, but none of the members of our team are going to become pro bowlers anytime soon. Unfortunately fun does not always equal winning and, whether I like it or not, for me, sometimes activities are more fun if I'm winning.

Individually, all the members of our team definitely have our good nights. Unfortunately we can't always get those good nights to happen for more than one of us at a time. So, at the end of the season last spring, we were all grousing about how poorly we had done in the rankings. (If I remember right, we were 19th in a league of 20 teams. Ouch!) We would love to do better this year, but how?

My suggestion was that we put our money where our mouths are. My idea was that for each game that you do not get your average, you have to pay. How much? We decided on 25 cents. Is a possible penalty of 75 cents on the night really going to change things? Maybe. Maybe not.

Maybe the mere thought that we each have a goal to reach will be enough to help us do better this year. Maybe the thought of relentless ridicule and fun-making at our expense by the other members of the team will be enough. I guess only time will tell.

As for me, I think I need this kind of thing to push me to do better. But what motivates you to do your best?