Friday, March 19, 2010

A New Life's resolution - Day #59 (Spiritual)

If you're just joining us, check out the explanation of my "New Life Resolution"

Day #59 - Spiritual

According to http://www.definitionofwellness.com/, "The spiritual dimension of wellness involves seeking meaning and purpose in human existence. It includes the development of a deep appreciation for the depth and expanse of life and natural forces that exist in the universe."

This week I've decided to do something a little different and totally steal an idea from a friend of mine that writes a blog called Your Pal, Jill. She is a wonderful writer that I went to college with. She's a huge fan of old-fashioned letter writing and all that that entails, so her blog is a series of letters to people/places/things she has messages for. Check her out because she's very witty!


The spiritual letter goes to God.

Dear God, Heavenly Father, Yahweh, Jehovah,
     You have so many names, I hardly know what to call you most of the time.  Although I'm told you know me intimately (down to the number of hairs on my head) and yet, sometimes I feel as though we've never met. I am often lonely and unsure of what I should be doing with my life.  I try to be still and listen for any messages you have for me, but all too often it feels like you aren't speaking to me.  Perhaps you are and I'm just not able to understand you.  If that's the case, you know my limitations and I hope you would find a way to communicate that you know I will understand.
     I know that it is not possible for me to know your mind, but I'm very confused about who you are exactly.  I am told you are loving God and yet I've also been made VERY aware that if I step a foot out of line, I will be severely punished.  Yet these same rules don't seem to apply to other people.
     There have been times in my life when I have been nearly inconsolable with grief because someone I loved was "taken home" to you.  At those times I wanted to yell and scream and demand an explanation from you.  But the fear of your retribution keeps me from doing that.  Even writing this letter makes me feel as though I'm opening myself up for years of punishment for being "cheeky" and "talking back."
     How is possible for us to have the close relationship I'm told you long for with all of your children if I have to keep these things to myself?  In my relationships with people here on Earth, I've found those times when we disagree or argue or have to confront one another are the times that our bonds are made the strongest.  Those trials and tribulations require an honesty and forthrightness that I don't feel I'm able to let myself have with you.
    This weekend I will go to your house and I hope that I will find you there.  I want us to be able to meet in the solitude of prayer and the fellowship of singing and through those things truly become a Father and daughter.

With all that I am,
Heather 

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